Friday, September 09, 2005

Wow.

For those of you that have never seen a circumcision done....let me tell you, it's not a pretty sight.

If you're male, you may want to turn away and scroll down 'til I'm finished. (w/ your fingers in your ears, singing "lalalalalallaa")

So, my poor baby....I feel bad. All this for the sake of vanity...and not even HIS vanity. His father's and my vanity! His father's because he doesn't want Jack to be different in the locker room...MINE, because I'm a girl...and I know I wouldn't want one of those hooded things coming at me, so I figure none of his future girlfriends will, either. And far be it for me to ruin his sex life later on. ("geez mom, thanks to you, and your decision NOT to get me snipped, i can't get a date!")

Anyhow....i digress...

So, I decided to watch...partly because the only thing keeping me from the field of medicine is my complete inability to add numbers together. You add letters into those equations, and I want to jump off a bridge....but, anyhow, i wanted to see how it was done.

Let's just say it involves needles, a large clamp, and an exacto knife...First they inject numbing stuff into the base of his pee-pee, which causes MAJOR swelling in those areas. THEN, they take these scissor clamps, and clamp the sides of the offending skin.THEN, they take a metal scraper, and scrape under the offending skin, to break any attachements. THEN, they take this metal cup, and stick it under the offending skin to cover the little head of the widdle pee-pee.THEN comes the clamp....which attaches to the base of the pee-pee, on the outside, and is cranked up until it is SQUEEEEEEZING the skin to the bottom of the cup on the inside.THEN they take the exacto knife, and cut the skin from around where they meet up.

Poor thing.....he screamed for about a half hour, solid, after i got him into the car. Then he fell asleep. He's still sleeping...just waiting for him to wake up and scream continuously for the remainder of the day.

Anyhow, the doctor offered me the foreskin. Um...how often does this happen? Do people actually say "yes, let me take that home, and stick it in the freezer to show my son when he's 20....So he can faint at my feet" ? It's like the placenta....please let me take that home, to show the neighbors. What is WRONG w/ people?? Is this a common occurance???

Anyhow....so that was the whole procedure.

And the boys can return to reading now.

Funny sight: I went to McDonalds before i went to pick up arianna from school. The 18 year old, or so, that took my money was straight out of a 70's porno. He had, no joke, a Handlebar Bushy mustache (think bad pornos), and a trucker's Mullet. He thought he was stylin. Is this the new look?? Do 18 year old girls actually think this is sexy?? Because all it inspires from me is the need to laugh hysterically, and then vomit. But, maybe that's just me.

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